A mixed bag in this morning’s papers, with the the same tripe being travelled out over most of the pages, in between the hacks wet dreams about Lewis Hamilton and the paucity of performance by the England cricket team.

Kicking it all off, it seems Arsene is being offered a £3.5m per year deal for the next four years with a ‘Get Out Of Jail Free’ card being offered at the end of each season, so sayeth the News of the Screws. According to the report, ‘A Top Arsenal Source’ revealed,

Arsene is the life and soul of this club. He has been offered a new deal but will be allowed to leave for nothing at the end of every season if he chooses

The paper states that the Board hope he will sign the deal before the first team starts pre-season training next week and that this is all coming to a head because of ‘fears that speculation over his future could unsettle the players‘. And of course, the hacks would love such a clause to exist because it means they can run their tired and lazy speculation each summer, eventually be proven right when Arsene does decide to retire, under their ‘exclusive’ headlines of ‘Arsene can’t be Arsed anymore‘. Equally, they will love it because the ongoing speculation about Cesc can continue, including missing out some phrases from what was a completely sensible quote given to the media by his Mr 20%. Joseba Diaz is lazily quoted as saying,

Cesc has not got plans to leave Arsenal. At this moment, there is no offer from Madrid and no negotiation. Cesc will start to train next week but you never know what might happen. It could all change.

Of course for the hack in question to have included the full quote might actually have changed perceptions about their doom-mongering or rather lazy-arsenalled attempt at it. Diaz had in fact been widely quoted elsewhere as saying,

If Arsene Wenger had gone away from Arsenal, everything would be different because he is the soccer father of Cesc, and the boy has a lot to thank him for. Cesc has not considered an exit from Arsenal. At the moment, there is neither an offer from Madrid for Cesc’s services or any type of negotiation. It has been said that I have been at the Bernabeu to talk with Madrid about a move, but this is false. Cesc will begin training with Arsenal, but this is football and you never know what can happen – everything can change. But right now it is impossible that Cesc will be in Madrid, because there isn’t any offer

Which is somewhat different to the angle that the Screws wants to portray. The comments by Diaz are about as definitive as you can get and short of saying, Cesc is at Arsenal for life irrespective of who is boss and how well they do (which incidentally nobody would believe), but never let the full quote get in the way of a sensationalist piece.

Eduardo da Silva introduces himself to the waiting world with tales of derring-do, recounting how the hardship he endured – sleeping in a cold stadium in a Croatian winter, no cash, no home – as a 15 year old boy which given how cold the weather can get over there means going for a Dudu must have been ‘character building. The tales of homesickness and how they have been overcome indicate an inner strength which will hopefully mean that he can cope with the scrutiny of the Premiership. Meanwhile Jeremie Aliadiere tells how ‘You ruined my career Wenger‘, guaranteeing himself a warm reception on his return with his ‘Frockney’ accent. An indicative quote is,

At Arsenal I would just train and then, at the end of the week, when the squad was put up, if I wasn’t in it – that would be it. Arsene Wenger would not come and talk to me and telly me why

Jesus. I wonder if the boy thought about going to Arsene and asking, ‘What area of my game do I need to work on to get into the team regularly?’. The answer to my question comes from a later quote, showing just how little grasp he has of what was required of him,

Whenever I played at Arsenal, I felt like I had to score a goal or do something special

Leaving aside the bloody obvious. In fact no I won’t. A centre forward is supposed to score. That’s their primary role in the team. Playing for Arsenal requires that both of the observations Aliadiere makes come true. And also a firm indicator as to why he failed to make the grade at the Club. Hey ho but in today’s Blame someone else, it’s not my fault culture, at least Jeremie can console himself with his pile of pennies that he got for the interview.

Jose Antonio Reyes has apparently been in London trying to resolve the thorny issue of the fee demanded by the club. It led me to believe that I may well have woken up in a parallel universe because there was another outbreak of sanity by his Mr 20%,

Arsenal are not asking for 20 million euros but they are asking for a reasonable fee in accordance with what they paid to Sevilla

Hold on a minute, we’re supposed to be the bad guys, holding out for a fortune whilst the poor, enslaved JAR is being denied the right to ply his trade at The Bernabeu. The only bit missing was how Madrid were holding everything up by offering a derisory €6m. Still, it seems that this one is moving towards its conclusion although the pace is about the same as his departure on loan so he’ll probably be signed by Madrid in August some time.

Gunnerblog reports that a deal has been agreed with Caen for the Ligue 2 Player Of The Season Yoan Goufrann but he will be loaned back to the Club next year to continue his development in Le Championnat in the same way Carlos Vela is going to in the Primera Division.

I’m feeling bright and optimistic about the coming season and no tired hack is going to ruin it for me. Well, not for today at least so enjoy your day.

’til Tomorrow.